Discover the Beauty of Anger
1. Understanding Emotions
Do you struggle with understanding your emotions and how they affect you? Learning about the core emotions can help you improve your emotional regulation skills. Being more informed about the core emotions can allow for more open and honest communication with your loved ones. This month, we will be focusing on the core emotion of anger.
2. What is Anger?
Anger is characterized by annoyance, irritation, antagonism or hostility, usually towards people or situations in your life. However, anger can also be caused by your internal thought processes or memories. Anger can show up in many different ways, including:
- Facial expressions: frowning or glaring
- Tone of voice: yelling or growling, louder
- Physiological responses: sweating, tingling or turning red
- Aggressive behaviours: hitting or throwing objects
- Retreating behaviours: stonewalled and non-responsive
On a biological level, anger triggers your “fight or flight” response, which releases stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline. This stress response increases your heart rate, blood pressure, body temperature and respiration, in preparation to face or run away from the current situation. The “fight or flight” response helps focus our body and minds on survival when facing an immediate threat. However, if we are stuck in the “fight or flight” response long-term, it can have detrimental effects on our health, including:
- Insomnia
- Stroke
- Heart attack
- High blood pressure
- Headaches
- Anxiety
3. The Challenges and Misconceptions About Anger
It’s commonly thought that anger is only a negative emotion, but that is not true. Anger can be used for positive change. It can help you understand what your priorities are and motivate you to reach your goals.
Anger can be a natural reaction to bad situations, letting you know that what is happening is going against your values and boundaries so that you can take immediate action.It does not have to lead to physical or verbal aggression. Your anger can be channeled into healthier outlets that do not harm yourself or the people around you. Another common misconception is that anger should be suppressed; this is often an adopted cultural practice within Asians to hide our displeasure in order to maintain pride, strength and posture. This can cause you to turn your anger inward, which can lead to health issues such as depression and anxiety. Instead, anger management strategies can help you reduce and cope with your anger in healthy ways.
4.Tips to Acknowledge and Cope with Anger
What is vital about anger regulation is how you respond to your anger and what actions you choose to take. Here are 6 strategies you can use to help manage your anger:
Tip 1: Relaxation
Use relaxation techniques such as breathing exercises and relaxing imagery when you’re in a tense situation. Try yoga-like exercises that can relax your muscles and make you feel calmer.
Tip 2: Improve Your Communication
When we are mad, it can be easy to jump to conclusions that may not be true. Take a moment to slow down and think. Listen to what the other person is saying and try to see the situation from their perspective before responding.
Tip 3: Change Your Environment
Notice what things in your environment trigger your anger and change them if possible. For example, do you find yourself getting angry at certain times of the day? Try to schedule some “personal time” during stressful parts of your day, to allow yourself time to relax.
Tip 4: Cognitive Restructuring
Typically, people’s thoughts tend to be dramatic and aggressive when mad. Replace these thoughts with more rational and logical thoughts. Marsha Lineham, the creator of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), would say that when we can develop a wise mind and practice dialectical thinking, we can better regulate our emotions, especially anger. One DBT skill is dialectical (the integration of opposites) thinking: when something goes wrong, instead of thinking “Everything is ruined”, think “This is frustrating, and this is not the end of the world as there are other things going ok in my life. Getting angry will not fix this.” When we can articulate our emotions (i.e. feeling frustrated) and also the silver lining in the situation (i.e. this is not the end of the world), it can help us calm down and have clearer thoughts to deal with the situations, allowing us to not let our anger get the better of us. Sign up to get posted with the next DBT course date!
Relational and emotionally-based therapy models like Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) or Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP) can help you learn how to manage your anger.
Learning to be mindful of your emotions may be hard, but it can ultimately result in many positive changes in your mental well-being, relationships with others, day-to-day interactions, and more.
At Grace Health Centre, our team of physicians, registered psychotherapists and social workers offer clinical counselling in individual, couple or family counselling. Book your free 15-minute consultation here to get started on your journey to wellness.
A free resource Grace Health Centre offers is supportive psychotherapy groups, which provides you with the support you need while equipping you with practical tools to build connection, resiliency and improved coping. There are three supportive psychotherapy groups ongoing currently: the “Mental Health Supportive Psychotherapy Group”. the “Parenting Supportive Psychotherapy Group” and the “Neurodiversity Supportive Psychotherapy Group”. For more information, you can visit our page.
You are not alone in this and being a part of a learning group community setting can be life-changing.
*Disclaimer: The information in this blog post is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Should you have been struggling any emotional or mental health challenges and would like to seek professional helps, please talk to your family physician, or professionals like Registered Social Worker or Registered Psychotherapists.