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Hold Me Tight Let Me Go Family Relationship Education Program

Home  /  Community Mental Health Programs  /  Hold Me Tight Let Me Go Family Relationship Education Program

Preamble:

Hold Me Tight® Let Me Go Family Relationship Education Program

The Hold Me Tight® Let Me Go Family Program is based on the Hold Me Tight® Couple Program: Conversations for Connection, an educational form of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) originated by Dr. Sue Johnson and adapted for Families with Adolescents (Ages 10-25) It is a five session, 15 hour educational program based on the theory and practice of Emotionally Focused Family Therapy (EFFT).

In this program, we seek to free up what has blocked the caregivers’ wired-in capacity to provide protection and nurturance. We also seek to help adolescents restore their trust so they can more safely reach for care and nurturance when needed. This workshop helps families to take control of rigid patterns and clarify emotional signals about needs and fears in a way that encourages family members to respond with openness, accessibility, responsiveness and emotional engagement. You can also visit www.ICEEFT.com for more information.

Sign up Today

To inquire more and be notified when course date opens, please email therapy@gracehealthcentre.ca with subject line: Interested in HMTLMG Family Course.

Program Schedule:

What You Will Learn in the Program:

5 Sessions (15 Hours)
    • This program consists of 5 three-hour modules (15 hours total) that will take place on:
      • DATEDATES: New Course opens FALL 2022 
      • timeTIME: To be determined
    • Each session will revolve around a certain topic that is accompanied by a key conversation and several hands-on exercises that require your active participation.
  1. Understanding the Caregiving Attachment System and Co-Caregiving Alliance
    1. Conversation 1: Caregiving Attachment and Alliance: Demon Dialogues – Parents’ View  (parent’s only)
  2. Safety, Secure Bonding, and Family
    1. Conversation 2: Family Bonding and Security Priming (parents with children)
  3. How Love Goes Wrong
    1. Conversation 3: What Drives Demon Dialogues? (parents with children)
  4. Separate Adolescent and Caregiver/Parent Groups and Teen Groups
    1. Conversation 4: Peer Support: Separate Parent and Adolescent/Adult Children Groups 
  5. Reconnecting the Attachment and Caregiving Systems 
    1. Conversation 5: Hold Me Tight, Family Style (parents with children)

Program Delivery:

    • Online delivery via the platform provided
    • Languages Offered: Cantonese with some English (for adolescents who may require English)

Course Fees:

You may come as an individual, but we highly encourage your partner and children to join. Pricing for individuals is the same as a family unit (up to 2 parents and up to 2 children)

    1. Course Material Fees: 
      All participants are required to purchase copyrighted course material and resources.The fees above include assistant fees, copyright, eBooks, 26 audio recordings, and 40+ videos
      • Standard Rate: $500.00 plus HST = 565.00 CAD 
      • Early Bird Rate: $400.00 plus HST = $452.00 CAD 
      • Full Time Student/Retired 55+ Rate: $300.00 plus HST = $339.00 CAD
    2. Clinical Service Fees:
      Clinical service fees are covered by OHIP if the facilitator is an Ontario physician for Ontario residents who complete the program.
      • Non-OHIP Registration Program Fee (Applies to all rate types)
        • $1000.00 plus HST = $1130.00 CAD

Meet Your Doctor:

Dr. Tat-Ying Wong is a General Practitioner that graduated with his Doctorate in Medicine from the University of Toronto and has extensive experience and training in marital, family, and sexual therapy. Dr. Wong is also the only Cantonese speaking certified EFT International Trainer,  training thousands of social workers, counsellors, couple and family therapists, clergy, psychologists, physicians and nurses in Asia and North America. His special interests include premarital counselling, couples therapy, emotional disorders, trauma, neurodiversity, families in ministry, cultural contextualization of family therapy to Chinese families, family therapy related to medical problems and training and supervision of lay and professional helpers. Dr. Wong is involved in psychoeducation and regularly leads groups for individuals on self esteem, managing emotions, Hold Me Tight® and Created for Connection groups for couples, Hold Me Tight Let Me Go groups for families with adolescents, and other  couple and parent training and support groups. Dr. Wong published the first and only EFT outcome study with Chinese couples based on Hold Me Tight and Created for Connection, showing couples improved their attachment security, dyadic adjustment and family functioning after the program.

Languages Spoken: English, Cantonese, Mandarin

Common Questions

  1. How do we get our adolescents in the door?
    1. Any way you can. Every family is different: some have a conversation laying down expectations, other parents try to reason with their teens, and others frankly bribe their teens and trust that the program will be effective even if they start off resisting. There is no right or wrong way to go about it. Talking about our relationships in a group setting with others can feel weird. No worries; it isn’t supposed to feel comfortable. We will try our best to make it feel safe once you get here. 
  2. What is wrong with our family? Are we ineffective at this parenting business because we have no influence whatsoever on our child?
    1. That your teen will resist coming to this program has nothing to do with you being bad or ineffective parents or your adolescent child, for that matter, being particularly rebellious or negative. It has to do with the normal divide that many families find themselves experiencing during the phase of adolescence. Part of why we have this workshop is to help families understand what motivates parents and adolescents to, at times, be at odds with each other, and facilitate conversations to soften the tensions that often color everyday interactions.
  3. Will my adolescent children get anything out of this if they go in with a big wall up?
    1. What we have found is that the day has proven useful even for adolescents who really don’t want to be in it with us (which describes most adolescents.) By the end of the day, all adolescents have acknowledged, at the very least, that they felt more understood or that they understood their parents more. Many actually said they were glad they came. To quote some recent participants:
      “I give you guys a B and I am a hard grader,” said one 14-year-old recently.
      “I liked the part when all the adolescents met with a group leader without the parents because I realized our family wasn’t so different or bad.”
      “I felt like everybody else and that made me more relaxed about it all.”

PROGRAM APPLICATION

Program Participation Agreement Form
    1. This is an educational program that does not replace the need for professional help and medications. Participants need to continue their current treatment during the course.  Even though the facilitators are trained and licensed mental health professionals, they are not acting as an individual therapist in their role as course facilitator.  The course materials are presented from a scientific perspective.
    2. Participants need to be stable, able to commit the time required, concentrate, absorb the key concepts, complete the basic exercises, and not be at risk to themselves or others so that a safe and productive learning environment can be maintained. The facilitators will ask participants who need additional help to consult their helping professionals. Participants who are not suitable for the course will be provided with a refund less administrative charge of $20.
    3. Most participants will benefit from listening to the course content several times to improve comprehension and retention.
    4. Attendance of all the online sessions, engaging with the audio-visual and written course material for each session, and participation in the in class discussions, sharing, self-reflection and skill building exercises are required for maximum benefit and growth.
    5. For optimal learning, participants are encouraged to review each lesson.
    6. Participants will keep the personal sharing and discussion confidential to protect each other’s privacy.
    7. Participants who are absent for emergencies, illness and other reasons beyond their control are expected to notify the facilitator as soon as possible and complete the work for the session that they have missed to the best of their ability.
    8. I acknowledge that my personal and relational growth is my own responsibility and am willing to take this responsibility by facing myself, engaging and renewing my way of thinking, beliefs, attitudes, values, behaviour and experience without avoiding/blaming myself or others. I understand that I am fully and solely responsible for the results and decisions that I make regarding my use of this course. I release the facilitator, the program developer, and all related institutions and organizations from any and all liability and accept full responsibility for my involvement in this course and the use of any related materials.
    9. Participants can support each other through mutual acceptance, understanding, validation, empathy and encouragement.
    10. Participants are also required to complete self-assessments before and after the course to gauge their progress and encourage self-awareness and self-reflection, which is the first step in personal and relational growth.
    11. In emergency situations or times when the participant is at imminent risk of hurting him/herself or others, then he or she needs to go to the closest emergency department or call 911 for immediate assistance.
    12. Participants may be involved in photographs, testimonies, and the production of short audio-visual clips for the purpose of promotion and helping other course participants.
    13. Participants understand the Risks of using electronic communication and that Grace Health Centre (GHC) Team will use reasonable means to protect the security and confidentiality of information sent and received using email and/or text messages. However, because of the risks outlined below, the GHC Team cannot guarantee the security and confidentiality of electronic communications.
      • Use of electronic communications to discuss sensitive information can increase the risk of such information being disclosed to third parties.
      • Despite reasonable efforts to protect the privacy and security of electronic communication, it is not possible to completely secure the information.
      • Employers and online services may have a legal right to inspect and keep electronic communications that pass through their system.
      • Electronic communications can introduce malware into a computer system and potentially damage or disrupt the computer, networks, and security settings.
      • Electronic communications can be forwarded, intercepted, circulated, stored, or even changed without the knowledge or permission of the GHC Team or the patient.
      • Even after the sender and recipient have deleted copies of electronic communication, back-up copies may exist on a computer system.
      • Electronic communications may be disclosed in accordance with a duty to report or a court order.
      • Videoconferencing using services may be more open to interception than other forms of videoconferencing.

Participants acknowledge and understand that despite recommendations that encryption software be used as a security mechanism for electronic communications, it is possible that communications with the GHC Team using the Services may not be encrypted. Despite this, I agree to communicate using video conferencing, email and/or text messages with a full understanding of the risk.